I’m waiting for the night to fall
When everything is bearable
And there in the still
All that you feel
Usually this song is like it’s meant to me. I get goosebumps every time I hear it. And then there are days like today, when the night is not my friend.
Actually, the night is still a friend. It’s me that can’t bare myself. The self-pity, the “poor me”, the I feel lonely. All these feelings make me an unbareable company, and yet they exist.
This may sound depressing and it may look like I’m depressed, but that’s not the case. I’m just going through a rough patch. It will wear off in time. This has happened to me so many times in my life that I’ve lost count.
I find myself feeling attracted to someone and all sorts of thoughts and feelings start to assail me. I start creating full movies in my head and in most cases I’m in the worst position or the outcome is not the best for me.
I have to stop thinking.